A Chat with City Farmhouse by Jennifer O’Brien (Creativity over Coffee)

Guess what, friends! It’s time for our next installment of Creativity Over Coffee and can’t wait for you to share my chat with Jennifer O’Brien creator of City Farmhouse! You’re gonna love it! So grab your coffee (or tea) and join us!

Creativity Over Coffee

Meet Jen founder of City Farmhouse by Jennifer O’Brien. We have been friends for years and years. I think maybe 12 years. One morning I stubbled across Jen’s blog and fell in love with her simple coastal style. There was so much I could relate to from her writing and photography. She was also a mom of two boys, loved the ocean, and also had a very close relationship to her father. We’ve hung out in person several times but have talked extensively online too. It’s been so wonderful to watch Jen’s path grow and expand. She really is so inspiring and I think you’re gonna love this interview. Meet Jen:

A Chat with Jennifer O’Brien

Thank you so much for deciding to join me for coffee and chat about your creative process. When I had just graduated from film school in London and couldn’t find work, I found inspiration through the many biographies I read from the library. I used to go there each week and take out more.

Many people believe they are not creative. I hear this all the time. It is my hope with these conversations with my talented friends that I hope to inspire my readers to believe that they truly are creative. That creativity is just sitting inside of them waiting to bubble over.

Hi Jen, you really are so creative – you create beautiful interiors, capture beautiful photography on your blog, design gorgeous pillows, and you are such a gifted writer. The list is endless. Can you share more about your creative path with my readers?

Jen – Thank you, Danielle, for giving me this opportunity to share a bit about my creative journey with your readers. Hi, I’m Jennifer O’Brien from the design blog City Farmhouse. I started the blog fourteen years ago as a way to connect and share my ideas with other home enthusiasts. It quickly morphed into a career I became passionate about, with the added bonus of a wonderful creative community with friends like Danielle.

When do you feel most creative or happy?

Jen – I am happiest when I unplug and allow myself the gift of being present. It sounds so cliché, but it’s the honest truth. Being present allows me to connect with my family and to the world around me and pull inspiration that I can’t if I am focused on posting. Other creatives can do this so seamlessly, and for a long time, I wondered why I was one of them. I actually beat myself up about it, but now I realize it’s just how I work best, and there is nothing wrong with it. If I’m worried about capturing a moment, then I can’t be in the moment. That’s just how I work. I’ve realized I’m not a person who can merge parts of my life and still be creative. I have to compartmentalize. And then, ever so often, come those moments so authentically captured that I can both be there for it all and share it with the world.

Who or what inspires you?

Jen – There are so many things that inspire me, but lately, I have been drawn to women’s stories, past and present. Vulnerability and struggle, in all their forms, inspire me and make me feel connected to something bigger. Patterns and colors that feel timeless and inspired by another time ignite a creative flicker, which then often leads to a flame. Color palettes found in nature or by the seashore inspire me on a daily basis.

Many of my readers dream of writing books. I know you just finished your first novel, and I think you’re also working on another book. How are you finding that process? Can you share more about finding a literary agent and a publisher?

Jen – I started writing as a way to heal and share stories that had only lived in my head. My first novel, The House That Fixed Me, took me a few years to write on and off. After six months of querying literary agents, I secured one. That first book went on submission and went to acquisitions at a large publisher, but in the end, they decided not to purchase it. I was heartbroken and gutted, but I knew I couldn’t give up. I finished book two, House in Bloom, last May and began querying agents and publishers. I signed with a small press but then pulled out because it wasn’t the right fit. I’m glad I listened to my gut because I am now with Gardner Literary Agency. I am hoping my book will go on submission by the summer.

I get so many questions about my writing journey and how it works. Basically, when you query agents, you send a resume with your book summary and credentials in the hopes they want to read more and ultimately request a full manuscript. If they do and love your work, they will sign you. If you are signed with an agent, that will open you up to about 98% of publishers who require an agent for submission. From there, if your goal is to be traditionally published, you pray that one of those publishers will buy your book. I’m told from that point to when your book comes out in the world in print is about two years. It’s a very lengthy process that requires an insane amount of patience. Agents, on average, sign 1% of the books they are queried. So add that time to find an agent onto the two years, and it’s an epic lapse in time. That is why authors often self-publish, go with a hybrid publisher, or give up.

That really is fascinating to hear the whole process. I didn’t realize it takes so long for a book to be published. How has social media helped or hindered your business and creative process?

Jen – For me, social media is a double-edged sword. I love the ability to connect with other creatives and share my ideas with anyone who’ll listen, but it’s also depleting. I feel like I’m on a hamster wheel trying to chase something that doesn’t exist or outdo my last project. Through the years, I’ve realized it’s better for me to go at my own pace, and often, that means sharing less to preserve my sanity and creative flow.

What’s your favorite color?

Jen – I love green, whether I wear it, paint with it, or use it in my décor. I also love any organic color found in nature or by the sea.

I know you were very close to your dad (as I was to my own dad). If you’re comfortable, can you share more about your relationship with him and how that has shaped the person you are?

Jen – I’ve experienced a good amount of loss in my life starting in my early twenties, and I can say it’s made me an overall better human. If there’s one silver lining that comes from loss and grief, it’s seeing the world through a different lens. I am a softer person, a kinder person from seeing my mom wilt away before my eyes. I am a braver person because of the sudden loss of my sister, who still had so much life ahead of her. And I am a person who doesn’t take a single thing for granted because of the loss of my dad five years ago.

Growing up, my dad was tough when it mattered. He stressed education, music, travel, honesty, and overall humility. He softened like butter as I grew into a woman and became a mother. I would say in my adult years, he was one of my closest and dearest friends. The loss of him hit hard as he was such a supportive, stable, even-keeled, and joyful presence in my life. People would always say, “Your dad always has a smile on his face.” And he did. He was the most optimistic person I’d ever met. Considering all he went through as a kid and even as an adult, to have such reside in something bigger was to be infinitely admired and treasured.

My dad grew up very poor. They would refer to him as “the kid from the wrong side of the tracks.” With holes in his socks and shoes, a shortage of food on the daily, and a tumultuous home life, he went to work at 12. He found two people who believed in him, and that ultimately changed the course of his life. His high school music teacher and a grocery store owner from his town saw his drive and determination. He worked hard, received an academic scholarship to USC in California, and, with his trumpet in hand, made the famous marching band. He even marched in the Rose Bowl in 1953 and worked at CBS Studios, where he met many famous stars in his day and was even an extra in A Star is Born. He would always say, “It just takes one person to believe in you to change everything.” And he was lucky enough to have two.

Even beyond time and space, my dad is shaping the family he left behind. And that makes my heart sing like the birds on a blissful summer day. My son left to go back to college last week, and in his jacket pocket, he tucked away his mass card. When I asked my son about it, he said that every day, he thinks about him and the courage it took for him to want a better life. And that my dad’s story inspires him to want more for himself and to not settle. My cup runneth over. I think that’s all you can ask for when your loved ones leave this earth. That they’ll be remembered and that their stories will live on and continue to inspire for generations to come.

I love that, Jen. I know he would be so proud of you and your sons. What’s life on Long Island like? How does it influence you and your work?

Jen – Eastern Long Island has a New England vibe and sensibility. We live along the coast, and every day, I am blessed to see the vibrant blue hues of the bay out my windows. We also live in the country, so to speak. If you are familiar with Long Island and the eight million people who live on the slender fish-like island, you would definitely agree. We live a ways from all that congestion. We still have open fields, farmland, and plenty of clean air. Summers on Long Island especially inspire me as the colors finally feel awake. It’s also when I feel the most connected to life and all of its simple offerings.

What advice would you give someone who wants to follow in your footsteps or who would like to start a creative business?

Jen – If I were to give advice to anyone just starting out in this crazy but rewarding business, it would be to know who you are, what you bring to the table, and what you want to say.

Growing up, I was a huge follower of INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO. At the end of the program, they would ask the interviewee these questions:

What is your favorite word? Mom

What is your least favorite word? No

What turns you on creatively, spiritually, or emotionally? Vulnerability

What turns you off? Rudeness

What is your favorite curse word? Fuck

What sound or noise do you love? The ocean and bird’s playful banter at the beginning of Spring.

What sound or noise do you hate? Chalk on a chalkboard and a car horn.

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Therapist

What profession would you not like to do? A doctor or nurse because I faint at the sight of blood.

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? You did good. You were a great mother and now you get to rest.

Wasn’t that just such a lovely chat? I love Jen’s outlook and can really relate to so much of what she said in this conversation. I can’t wait to read her books when they are published! Be sure to follow along with Jen.

If you’d like more Creativity Over Coffee you can read the full series here.

Photos courtesy of Jennifer O’Brien.

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